Marriage - The Lord's Way

The first miracle of our Lord Jesus was at a wedding feast in Cana, where He turned water into wine. Our science text books would say that water is colorless, odourless and tasteless as its physical properties. Yet our Lord was able to turn it into wine, which had color, odour, and taste. The significance of this miracle is that, when couples are in a marriage which is Christ centered, they will never get bored of each other because, Jesus takes the responsibility of holding the husband and wife together in marriage. The Bible says:

"Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as unto the Lord. For the husband is the head of the wife, even as Christ is the head of the church: and he is the saviour of the body. Therefore as the church is subject unto Christ, so let the wives be to their own husbands in every thing. Husbands, love your wives, even as Christ also loved the church, and gave himself for it" -Ephesians 5:22-25

A Christ centered marriage is a covenant where the husband and wife have a lifestyle based on Bible values and principles. Such couples will have the habit of going to church together and to partake of the Lord's Supper in Communion. Such families will have time for family prayer everyday. They would discuss topics related to the Bible, asking questions to each other, taking time to sit together and study the Bible. Moreover, such couples will complement one another very often and will not be afraid to say sorry to each other when they are wrong, because they know that it is not their own efforts, but it is Jesus who is holding their marriage together. Children born to such couples would look up to their parents, and they would develop the same lifestyle as their parents and treat their spouse with the same love, affection, and respect. These are all the fruits of a Christ centered marriage. The root of such a marriage is none other than faith in Jesus and His Grace. Couples only need to have their eyes fixed on Jesus and rely on His Grace rather than looking into their own efforts, and He will make sure that the wine in such marriages never runs out.

Ephesians 5:22-25 is an example of a Christ centered marriage. The problem in today's marriages is that many of them are not Christ centered. Husband tries to take from his wife that which only Christ is able to give, and likewise, the wife tries to take from her husband that which only Christ can give. When couples try to draw from each other something which only Jesus is able to provide, the result is, the wine in the marriage runs out.

For example, when a wife expects the husband to keep her happy all the time and compares her husband with other husbands. Instead of the Lord's Grace being the source of her happiness and wisdom, they would reach a point where the husband would eventually get frustrated. When the Lord's Grace is the source of her happiness and wisdom, the husband looking at his wife being cheerful in the Lord, would draw closer to her. Queen Esther is one such example where she delighted in the Lord and the Persian King drew near her as she had the Lord's wisdom and favor. On the other hand, when a husband, instead of drawing his strength from the Lord's Grace, expects his wife to be the source, where at one point the wife would eventually get exhausted, and ultimately result in the wine running out in the marriage. Boaz is a good example of a man of God, who delighted in the Lord, and the Grace of the Lord brought Ruth to him and she became the wife of Boaz.

Marriages today are media centered rather than being Christ centered. Husband and wife compare themselves with celebrities on media, or with other people on social media rather than fixing their eyes on the Lord. They rely on other people's opinion rather than seeking the Lord's counsel from God's Word. The fruits of such marriages are always bad. Even children belonging to such parents develop insecurities and end up looking up to worldly people outside of their family for advice.

When the Lord created Adam, as described in the book of Genesis, He created him using the dust of the earth. Whereas when He created Eve, the Lord did not pick up another handful of dust from the earth, creating her apart from Adam. Neither did He pick up a bone from Adam's leg for him to dominate her, nor a bone from his head for her to dominate him. But rather, the Lord picked up a rib close to Adam's heart so that he would love her dearly. A husband whose lifestyle is based on this revelation from the Bible would not have trouble loving his wife. Likewise, a wife whose lifestyle is based on this revelation from the Lord's Word would have no trouble either to submit to her husband.

The Bible contains examples of several good couples who had their eyes fixed on the Lord, where the wine in their marriage never ran out. Just like how wine gets stronger as it ages, similarly couples in a Christ centered marriage will love each other and grow stronger with time.

If the wine in your marriage has run out, its not too late to start keeping your marriage Christ centered. If we notice, our Lord Jesus was able to turn water into wine within few seconds. Good wine usually takes years to develop, but the Lord was able to do it in an instant. Hence it's not too late to start keeping your marriage Christ centered, as Jesus can restore a marriage in a few days time which would take several months or years to restore in the natural. Remember, our Lord Jesus is not limited by time.

The benefits of having a Christ centered marriage is that, the couples would have morals and principles that are based on God's Word. Hence they would know that they are secure in Christ. Unlike for example, live-in relationships which are totally not Christ centered, where couples would not be able to reason with each other because, their morals and principles are not based on scripture. Hence even if a partner walks out of their relationship they dont have any ground where they will be able to stand and defend their relationship. However, in a Christ centered marriage, even if one of the partner tries to walk out, the other can stand on the Lord's grounds by the Word of the Lord, where the Lord Himself will defend such marriages. It is for this reason the Bible says:

"What therefore God hath joined together, let not man put asunder" - Mark 10:9

Marriage is not an occasion where two perfect people come together, but rather, it is a covenant where two people who are imperfect come together and become perfect in Christ Jesus. The first miracle of the law was water turning to blood, resulting in judgement and death. Whereas the first miracle of Grace is water turning to wine, resulting in celebration. A husband and his wife are to work as a team where the Lord is their leader and not the media or people on social media. When Jesus is the center of a marriage, there is always the supply of Grace which will never run out, as it is ever flowing as the Lord takes the responsibility. The Bible says:

"For the law was given by Moses, but grace and truth came by Jesus Christ" - John 1:17

Notice that Grace was not given, but rather, it came. The law tells us what not to do by saying, thou shall not commit adultery, and demands perfection. Whereas Grace supplies the love for your spouse. Grace is none other than our Lord Jesus Himself. Christ centered marriages have a sure foundation and are built upon the rock.